my dearest baby.

My darling baby. 

You are growing so quickly. For ten whole months I carried you inside of me, helping you grow and get ready to meet us. You've almost been on this Earth longer than you were in my belly. Now I hold you every night, revel in you every day. You are the closest thing to me; an extension of my very being. Every day I find something new I love about you. A new curl in your hair, a new sound you discover.

I wonder about you, who you will grow to become. How much of you will end up being me, and how much of you will be your daddy? Will you be wild like your mama, carefree without a worry in the world? Or will you be your papa, paying attention to every detail, never missing the smallest thing? How much of you will be your very own creation? Even the way you turn the page in a book is so beautiful and unique.

Whatever you become, whatever you grow to be, know that we love you and cherish you for it -- for every quirk and oddity, any and every beautiful flaw. We will find every bit of you perfect, we will love you absolutely, and always try to have as much patience as we did when we sat up with you all night. We cannot wait to discover the perfect person you are destined to grow to be, watching you learn and grow and blossom as you make your very own mark on this world.

I am so excited to meet you again every single day.

Xoxo,

Mama bird

one month.

My dear darling Emelyn,

Today you are one month old and your mama just cannot believe it. You're starting to outgrow diapers and clothes. You're awake most of the day now, napping shortly but starting to sleep longer through the night. You love to grab daddy's shirt when you're laying on his chest. Bath time is your favorite time of the day, you love to be held while you sleep, and I think I caught you smiling at me today..!

Right now you and I are cuddling in the backseat of daddy's car, waiting for him to get off work. It's silent except for the far off traffic and your tiny snoring. Every once in a while, you smile in your sleep, a smile as big as it gets. I always want to see that smile. I can't wait until you wake up and smile because I'm next to you, or you're smiling because of the Christmas lights on the tree, or when you're eating your first birthday cake..

Everything is going to come so fast and I'm so excited. I know one day I'm going to look at you and wonder where my little baby went, so in the meantime I will take as many photos as I can and live in every moment. I'm beyond happy that I get to be a part of your amazing little life.

Xoxo,
Mama bird

one week

Dear Emmy,

How are you so big already? I swear it was just weeks ago that I found out I was pregnant, days ago that my tummy was so big and I couldn't fit into any of my clothes, hours ago that I was feeling you kick, twist and hiccup on our way to the hospital to get ready to meet you!

Now you are finally here in my arms, snoring ever slightly and kicking your tiny feet. You give us the biggest accidental smiles and also the biggest yawns! You love listening to music, to mommy's voice and her silly songs, and all it takes is rubbing your head while saying "shhh, shhh, shhh" to get you to fall asleep.

This week has been so absolutely amazing. I can't stop taking photos of you - I want every moment to last forever. I am so thankful you are a happy, healthy baby. I already can't imagine my life without you in it and I can't wait for all of the things that come with you growing up. You will always be this tiny, sleeping baby to me, no matter how big you grow, how old you get or how one day you'll want to run away from home.

I love you, my Emmy bird, and you'll always be my baby.

xoxo,
Mama bird

time flies

Baby bean,

Time is going too quick! We have one more midwives appointment in just under two weeks, and then they will be visiting us at home every week until you decide to join us! You are just over 34 weeks, full of energy. You love to roll around as soon as mama settles in for bed, and you always have the hiccups. I told your papa today that I will miss having you in my belly and wish you could stay there forever sometimes! The smiles people give me and how your papa loves to hold my tummy when I sleep make me so happy. But we are both so excited to meet you and kiss your tiny fingers and toes. I already know that I'm going to have a hard time ever letting you go.

See you so soon!
mama bird xo

happy

Dear baby,

Today has been a tough day for your mama. Sometimes I wonder what I would do without your papa bear here to keep me so strong! I know one day you will think the same.. His arms will be one of your favorite places to sleep, just like they are mine, and any time you need to cry they will be there to wrap around you. From your first scraped knee to your first heartbreak, your daddy will always be there to kiss away the tears and make you smile again.

Your papa told me something today that I will always remember. He was wiping away my tears and he said me that we will never be perfect parents.  He told me that you will never always like us, that one day you will probably even try to run away! But, he said, we will do our best and that is all we should ever ask of each other -- just to be the best that we can possibly be.

We aren't perfect. Your daddy and I have not had a fairy tale wedding. We don't own our own home with a white picket fence,  there's always dirty dishes to be cleaned, and we only make the bed right before jumping into it. But we don't need these things to give you the world. We have made our apartment a little home, with pictures of your ultrasounds already decorating every room. We would rather sit together on the couch and feel your so-strong kicks than rush to do the dishes, and one day soon enough you will appreciate crawling into our messy unmade bed with us, even when we can't find half the pillows because they are buried under a mountain of blankets. We will all cuddle together in bed, even the puppy dog, and we will tell jokes and tickle each other's feet with our own, smile and laugh and sometimes even cry together. We will never be perfect, but we will be happy.

And in the end that's all that matters.

xoxo,
mama bird

dear baby,

Hello my darling baby.

Right now you are dancing in mommy's tummy, no doubt excited to make your debut into this big world. We are all so excited to meet you! You will be here in less than eight weeks now, time is just flying by. I can't believe it was back in June that I learned you were here and real, a tiny baby bean at that point, and now it's almost Christmas. You have gotten so big since then! I wish I had started writing to you earlier so I could tell you all of the stories and adventures you have brought us already. We know you are going to be trouble and we wouldn't have you any other way.

We will be sure to share everything with you, from mommy's cravings (lots of juicy fruit!) to how you like to kick all night.. Until daddy puts his hands on my belly to settle you down. You get hiccups when I'm getting ready to fall asleep that make my whole belly wiggle! And you are getting so strong.. You love to punch and kick the puppy whenever she lays her head on my tummy! She is going to love you so much, and I know you will love her just the same. She likes to sit in your bassinet! I know she is excited to meet you.

My dear, darling baby. We are counting down the days until we finally have you in our arms. I can't wait to kiss your tiny fingers and toes. I know your daddy is going to cry the first time you are in his arms. Meeting you is going to be worth this wait.. And the best thing that's ever happened to us.

Hugs and kisses,
mama bird